ll Engvall: Welcome to my garage. This is where I go to get away from the Honey-Do list. I joke about it guys, but I tell you, she runs that house, good lord. Yeah, I know, I know. If you're married, I'm telling you nothing you don't already know. But if you're single and thinking about getting married, listen up! You ain't never gonna win the arguement. If guys were a sports team, we'd be O-for.

ll Engvall: [Bill gives an example on being old] One morning, my son left to go to school and I was sitting at the coffee table in my bathrobe, reading the morning paper. My wife comes from behind me, starts kissing me on the neck, and goes, "Hey good-lookin', lets go upstairs and make love." And I *thought* about it! Wh-when did that start? God almighty, if I had been 20, that paper still would be hanging in the air. A trail of fire up the stairs. Now, I sit there going, "Ugh, that's 14 steps right there."